Here is a panel that I am helping to put together for the Phildelphia Transgender Health Conference
this June! If any of you can attend it would be MOST excellent. Trust me, I think this panel is not to be
missed!

Trans Feminism: Transforming Agency, Self-Esteem, and Critical Resistance.

This panel is designed to help participants gain a new knowledge about the growing movement of trans feminism including an analysis around cissexual privilege, Trans Misogyny, patriarchy and traditional sexism and how that analysis can be used by trans people, specially trans women to combat the daily oppression that they face in accessing health care. This workshop will focus on building agency and resistance by trans people in hopes of building greater awareness and self esteem as keys to mental health and positive health outcomes. Panelists will discuss their own process of building an analysis and how it has been key to maintaining mental health, building community, and resisting oppressive images and messages about bodies, lives, and self-worth of trans people in making health choices. A focus will be on engaging with the medical community, and developing healthy sexuality, and healthy interpersonal relationship through a trans feminist analysis. Participants will walk away with a broader sense of how feminism has been used to address the oppression trans people face, and how it is a tool that trans people can use to engage in dialogue about their bodies, lives, experiences, and cultural images. Panelists include mental health professionals, a medical doctors, a feminist scholar and biologist, a cultural critic, a public health expert, all of whom use a trans feminist analysis in their work. These trans people we speak from both their personal and professional experiences on how trans feminism can be used to resist cultural oppression and bigotry and enhance our lives and work with trans people.

Handbook Summary:
This panel will explore how trans feminism builds an empowered sense of agency, self esteem, and identity. Panelists will discussing trans feminism as a tool for critical analysis and resistance to cissexism, hegemony, patriarchy, transphobia, transmisogyny, and traditional sexism as often encountered in accessing medicine and mental healthcare.

Panelists:
Danielle Askini is a Trans feminist social worker, writer, therapist, and activist. She has worked as a public health researcher in Trans Health and a private practice therapist. Danielle launched Seattle’s first Transgender specific health program and currently works as National Program Manager of Gay Straight Alliance Network in San Francisco.

Rebecca Hammond contributes her knowledge of trans youth issues and her HIV research experience. She is currently the co-facilitator Trans Youth Toronto and a sexual health counselor at Hassle Free Clinic. Rebecca is completing a Masters degree thesis addressing how trans youth in Ontario come to experience vulnerability to HIV.

Joelle Ruby Ryan is a Ph.D. Candidate in American Culture Studies at Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio. Previously, she earned Master of Arts degrees in English Literature and Women’s Studies. Her dissertation is tentatively entitled: ìReel Gender: The Politics of Trans Representations in Film and Television.î

Julia Serano is an Oakland, California-based writer, spoken word performer, trans activist, and biologist. Julia is the author of Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity. er other writings have appeared in anthologies (including BITCHfest: Ten Years of Cultural Criticism from the Pages of Bitch Magazine and Word Warriors: 30 Leaders in the Women’s Spoken Word Movement) and in feminist, queer, pop culture and literary magazines and websites such as Bitch, AlterNet.org, Out, Feministing.com, Clamor, Kitchen Sink, make/shift, other, LiP and Transgender Tapestry.

Dr. Maddie Deutsch graduated with honors from the Chicago Medical
School in 2001 and is a board certification in emergency medicine physician. She a holds a Clinical Attending position in the Harbor-UCLA Department of Emergency Medicine. Maddie currently also has a private practice in Los Angeles and San Francisco with an
emphasis on serving LGBT people.

WTF?
I apparently have midas's touch.
Have sex with me and you are bound to end up having kids!
I have now through the magic of face book discovered that 3
out of 4 of my ex's have had kids, and what about number 4
you ask.... constitutionally incapable! So that kind of gives me
a 3 for 3 shot at it.

*grabs nail and hammer and drives nail through her head*

I seriously love them all, am wishing them the most joy, happiness,
and contendeness that their hearts can bring them and know they
will one and all be amazing dads.

But the irony is like fist F*(&#%#ing me to death and putting the
nail into the coffin of questions I ever had about having seriously
fucked up karma!

Perhaps Simon opened Pandora's box in fall of '07 with his questioning
of the future of our relationship because I can't have kids, but fuck
it has got to be the most real, paintul, persistent, and in my fucking
face reminder (read: mental scab / snag in the silk shirt that is
my consciousness) that I don't have a uterus.

As my make believe British grandmother would say.

Charming.

Or not so much. But either way. It's 3am. And I don't want to sleep to
punish myself for making an appointment with the Dentist (I HATE
DENTISTS)..... and looking up people on facebook I should have forgotten.

*shakes her head*

With that I will now try to sleep.
*curses and swears in every language she knows*

Seriously. wtf?
Just, rub my face in the dog shit a few more times why don't cha karma.
Great.. just... great.

At the panic threshold,
above which I live..
Realizations of bubbles ... burst,
and false economies crash as the interest compounds.

Hidden in the shadows and silence
of head above water and a life not quite
submerged or lived
in between the lines of others ... "realities"
I am not living.

I am here, heart beating impulsively.
Wondering and requestioning
my analysis and interpretation of the universe,
a world I cannot enter, nor hope to live within.

And outsiders orientation or purview,
is a distraction, highlighting the difference,
of a series of thoughts -- we call it theory here.
That sets us aside from
Blinders that allow others to live their lives only
looking forward.

I realize I cannot
Integrate my two realities.
That thing which I have known from uncovering.
That thing which is uncovered to me now,
a glimpse over the Berlin wall at this --other reality.
Which I could never be apart of.

The grass is not always greener on either side.

I wonder in what way do I balance on the border
of such a place between two communities.
Communist ideologies and idealism of egalitarianism.
Bad in practice. Good in theory.
Capitalist expansions and consumption.
Bad in practice. Unsavory in theory.

I am hovering just over that border of sanity and reality.
Recognizing the inherent and implicit truth that
lies behind people's subtle thoughts they never utter a word,
but eyes that dart so distinctively
communicating clearly.
I am not welcomed,
on their side of this border.

Who wants to live in a cage. On display.
Pacing back and forth with our thoughts of what we would do.
With our freedom if a revolution came.
I stare at their faces, even in pictures on facebook.
Recognizing
This whole side of you, that has until now
has lived only in my imagination.
Exploring the reasons why --in this emulation of your reasoning
I have never known or met these peoples,
but in tails and stories.

I will. Likely. Never meet nor, have a conversation, nor,
life in a reality.. in synch,
I am seconds off a ghost world I can never quite comprehend.

My heart ends with this line.
I am hoping you are fine.
On the other side of the wall.
At least,
I know my love is with you there.
Even if,
It will never reach you,
past the subtleties of reality.

Well I have been here about 6 months now.
It is all settling in. This city, that is.
I have been really involved with a start-up organization
of folks who gathered together to engage in civil disobedience
related to Prop 8 on the Friday night following the vote on Tuesday
the 4th. Everyone was pretty wrecked from the heart wrenching feeling
of having the California constitution amended to eliminate same sex
marriage. The group is called "One Struggle, One Fight"
http://www.onestruggleonefight.com You can watch clips of me talking
at City Hall welcoming two women who walked here to SF from LA to bring
their fight to the Supreme Court.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/video/video.php?v=50552166413&oid=38167058731

I still, a month later, am in a cluster-fuck about it when I think back
on it in terms of the long term historical impact. It has been so disappointing
to grow up at this point in history and to realize just how backwater the US
continues to be for the most part. It's deeply disturbing

I think that my job here has taken up a good chunk of my energy related
to blogging, commenting, thinking through political stuff. I have become
increasingly overwhelmed as I try to synthesize my sense of what this "moment"
holds for Me and my "people" in the broader context. The intense amount of
media-saturated and information-saturated-ness of this life has really started
to boggle my mind! I am really surprised that we are not all experiencing
information overload/burnout. Perhaps some of us just have more capacity
than others, some of us just tune it out. I however, turn up the volume and
gather as much information as possible.

Work has been pretty amazing. Mostly in that it has been a great opportunity
for me to grapple with the dealings and ins and outs of a non-profit that is on
the crux of going from local to national. Including all the interface, conference
calling, virtual communicating, organizing, meeting planning, conversation having,
and general information giving! I feel like the switch/router/hub between the
server (GSA Network) and the users (State based groups)... or as I like to
say when I tell people what I do, "I'm the Secretary of State." I help set
the foreign policy agenda taking the lead from our ED, and then set out to
execute it by building relationships, providing technical assistance to state
groups and facilitate them working with each other! *HA!* I guess I'm the
Hillary Clinton of my little queer org. It's pretty hysterical!

...
In terms of social life.
Other than work and my involvement with queer activism it has been pretty nil.
I have to, sadly, attribute this to a lack of attempt.
I think that a lot of things are holding me back (psychologically)! One of the
"tolls" that is frequently untold in being in a long distance relationship is just
the simple realization that ... it is hard to form friendships, when you have
someone else on the mind. I just don't find myself all that motivated to go out
and do stuff without a pre-established posse of friends. Going out by myself SUCKITH
ASS! Given the intense level of social anxiety that I still, to this day,
Ms. Daring Darer still feel! Nothing fucks me up more than going into a crowd
of wolves feeling like I'm buck naked (with no friends).

I think that eventually it will take time, but I will build solid relationships
with folks who have similar hang-out habits. It sucks ass that those people in
my life that have historically had that.. have typically been men, frequently with
romantic inclinations *yawns* .. and what an awkwardness to navigate 10,000 miles
from your partner.

He mine as well be on Jupiter!!! *HA!* Most men in the US could give-a-shit.. I
laugh at myself when I think: "wow, the moral character of the US has really deteriorated!"
me! The Tranny! HA! But you get what I mean. It is perhaps that age-old ego centric
misogynistic sexism that makes me barf --- the ever so self important men who think,
in the absense of another males presence, all women's knickers just fall off and
suddenly they're on all fours begging for it! HA! Makes me giggle!


Oh Barack.
We were hedging on you.
I hope that this latest little flare up with the queers,
doesn't lead us to..
more bad dating.
I hate bad dates.
And you seemed so hot from across the room.
Now that you're about to move into my living room.
Please just, let us get the fuck on with the 21st century already.
I'm over this 1850's bullshit.
The revival is over bitches.

Christ is..
SO DEAD.
Just.. let him lay in the ground already.
OVER
IT.

~D*

1. Estrogen after 7 days past due.
2. Lack of sleep.
3. 9,000 Miles from the person you love.
4. 3 Months since you saw that person last, 9 months before that.
4. Movie: P.S. I Love You

= 2 hours of non-stop crying like a baby

I have had 5 dreams in as many weeks.
All of them with my grandfather.
In all of them he says the same thing:
"A great fire is coming."

I have tried to figure out what he is talking about.
Every dream is the same. On a hill, looking down at a city.
We are on a ledge of some sort. He puts his hands over my
eyes. There is a flash, then he pulls them away, and everything
from land to sea is covered in flames.

"It is coming."
He says.
"A great fire."

That is it. Nothing really more to the dream other than that
part. Every time he brings me back to this old house we once
lived in, where my bedroom window overlooked a smoke stack.
The house is empty. It is winter outside.

He stands behind me in the far corner, out of sight. Just a disembodied
voice.

Kinda creepy!
I wonder what he is trying to warm me about.

~Danielle

This is the most amazing and hysterical short musical EVER!
Featuring some of my favorite actors/actresses: Neil Patrick Harris,
Jack Black, Maya Rudolph, John C. Reilly, Allison Janney, Margaret Cho,
Marc Shaiman, Rashida Jones, Sarah Chalke, and many many more.

OBAMA-NATION!
A Must Watch for anyone who wants to see some hysterical stuff!


YAY! LOVE THIS!
Danielle

I found this through a random search... of intriguing things,
namingly watching clips or Ron Paul R-Texas. Whom I greatly admire
if not for his social policy, than for his economic ones.

He is a secret.
I am a closet economic conservative.
Well. In some ways.

I don't think capitalism as we know it is altogether bad. I think
that it has been an interesting system for chaneling human greed
into a sometimes productive means. I do think that it has great
flaws that require it to be 'revised' and looked after carefully
by caretakers (i.e. Government)... not a traditionally conservative
approach (or is it?!). Ron Paul is fairly genius, and he is pointing
out a number of things that are hella scaring.

Namingly how are monetary system is a giant house of cards.
Which as all of you know, is currently falling down around our ears.

I have seen few very easy to understand explanations that take into
account all of the things I learned in Economics (yes, Econ was my minor).
And from what I have gathered by reading between the lines of corporate
filtered news channels

While the videos are hosted on a site selling gold and silver. I think
that it is fine, mostly because the man who wrote and narrates the video
Chris Martenson hasn't done a great job of posting them on his website.
http://www.chrismartenson.com He is fairly much a genius in breaking
down.

A. What is the United States current economic and monetary system.
B. When was that system invented ( a lot younger than you think 1971).
C. How did we come to this economic system.
D. What is going on in the world, and why is that system in jeopardy.
and
E. What is the current "economic meltdown" really about and what can you
do about it.

The link to buying gold is clear. Gold = the currency of last resort.
Over 3,000 currencies have failed throughout history. Many are currently
in the process of failing: see: Zimbabwe hyperinflation. The dollar is
by no stretch of the imagination "somehow exempt" because we have been
"The global super power" -- people have this teenage notion that, America
just "Can't Fail", it would be too unimaginable, too unthinkable. But really
when you look at China, do you really think the US is still the powerhouse
it once was? How much are we producing really?!

Anyhow.
I think that everyone. YES YOU DEAR READER!
Should take the time to watch this mans AMAZING videos.
It will break down for you, and catch you up on the Economy.
And you're probably asking yourself "Why would I waste time watching this instead
of surfing more and then watching Grey's Anatomy or Heroes"..
Here's the simple truth:

The end of our current economic regime is quickly coming to an end. Everyone has
said it. This black hole is going to get much bigger, much quicker, than most people
think. It is going to get VERY NASTY, very quickly. And it helps to know just exactly
how we got here.

So watch: Chris Martenson's videos here:
http://goldsilver.com/crash_course.php?cat_id=6&video_id=30

It's the most important thing you will have done in the last two weeks!

Next Journal Entry: I'll post some of my reflections on this.

~Danielle Askini

They come for us in the night
like spiders, dropping in space,
silks we cannot see suspended.
from our future,
the not too distant fate
we could not expect or anticipate.

stepping forth from the shadowy in between
the realms between realities, they
slither like snakes at the edges of
our consciousness just out of reach
but always just within strike.

And unrelenting
these unknowing vermon gather
Like cockroaches scattering at first light
take flight from our eyes
we only imagine we saw the shadow of their trail,
but they persist to eat on dead flesh or the
leftovers we forgot,
we never notice they are
missing...

Our crumbs.
They gather,
in the walls spaces, corners of ceilings,
cracks by the radiators, mouse holes
waiting,
watching silently.

Until we slumber contently,
And then strike.
Silent.
Deadly.
While we dream that this,
was all in our imaginations.

And in our last gaggle gasp,
make themselves known to be true
watching as we waste
they gloat
glowing eyes and all
For we forgot, to turn on
the light

Hot.
Not to mention brilliant.
And did I say sexy? Yes, he is. I <3 MSNBC.

Watch this:

on nights when I can't clear my head or sleep.
I read craigslist ads: missed connections.
Hoping that someone noticed me.
It makes me feel pathetic after I've read about 100 and
skimmed about 1000. And realize.
My life here is pretty fucking lonely.

"WHOSE CONSTITUTION!? OUR CONSTITUTION?! WHAT DO WE WANT?! JUSTICE! WHEN DO WE WANT IT ?!?! NOW!!!"

As many of you have probably heard, our side has declared defeat
in the fight against Proposition 8, a constitutional revision
that would strip away the equal protection clause of the California
Constitution and ban same-gender/sex marriage.

It is an outrage that on the same night that America elected its first
African American president that California's also voted to give farm
animals more rights than same sex couples!

WE HAVE TAKEN TO THE STREETS! In California. And I am call on all of
you to do the same in solidarity in Portland, New York, Boston, Ottawa,
Toronto and so on.. 30 states now have amended Jim Crow constitutions,
48 States have "Defense of Marriage Acts"... 2 states allow marriage.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!

Unless we start to organize on the large scale, the Mormon, Catholic,
and Avengelical Churches will pick us off 1 by 1. The Mormon Church spent
20 MILLION dollars to BUY this vote! The Catholic Church put up at least
3 Million (through Knights of Columbus etc..) Trust Me. Maine, Massachusetts,
New York. If they can do it here... You are next.

Last night, I joined with about 40 people to form an affinity group of people
to take to the streets for Justice. To Disrupt Traffic. Demand our Rights.
And Let our words be heard!

We marched with the other 5,000 Marchers approximately 2 blocks down Market
Street, before Locking Arms and Holding the intersection of 9th and Market.
We held the intersection against traffic, buses, and police for 2 hours
before being rejoined by the original marchers (who had marched a mile down
Market to the Castro, to Dolores Park, and then Back to rejoin our line
in Solidarity!) We then Marched BACK to City Hall, Then BACK to the Castro.
Taking control of the streets for 6 hours! Shouting: "What do we want?! JUSTICE!
When Do we want it?! NOW!!!" "WHO'S STREETS?! OUR STREETS!!! WHO'S RIGHTS?!
OUR RIGHTS!!!"

It was an amazing show of force.
I am calling upon you all, TAKE TO THE STREETS!
This action of 5,000 people was only organized on MySpace, Facebook, via.
Text message and phone calls. There was no official speakers or organizers.
There were no leaders. We worked on a model of consensus, community organizing,
and committed ourselves to non-violent civil disobedient demonstration against
Tyranny!

2,000 Protesters also Gathered in Salt Lake City, Utah to protest the involvement
of the Mormon Church, and it's illegal use of it's tax-free status to funnel money
into a campaign of lies and deception! We also are calling for the IRS to strip
the Later Day Saints of their Tax Exempt Status for violating federal laws that
prohibit Tax-Exempt organizations from engaging in political campaigns. We chanted:
"TAX THE CHURCH" and "SEPERATE CHURCH AND STATE!"

I urge you all.
Learn form our lesson.
Start now. Demonstrate NOW. Get visible NOW!
The No on Prop 8 campaign was horribly run by people who "feared" upsetting the public
by seeming "too gay" or "too demanding". They didn't show a single gay couple in
any of their TV ads. Nor did they engage communities of color or civil rights leaders
in talking about how this is a historically important event. 70% of African American
voters in California voted FOR Proposition 8. A devastating fact that reflects the use
of "Christian" messages and alliances made by the LDS/Mormons and Conservative Black
Churches. I don't blame people of color for this loss, they were flat out lied to,
deceived, and fear mongering was used to whip up their vote. (such as campaign ads
featuring Barack Obama saying: "I do not support same-sex marriage."

MARCH IN THE STREETS!
DEMAND YOUR RIGHTS!
FIGHT BACK AGAINST FUNDAMENTALISTS CHRISTIANS who have now stolen 34,000 people of their
marriages, and prevented hundreds of thousands more from ever being married!

And now.. for some photo and video loveliness!


I AM FUCKING PISSED OFF! WHO'S STREETS?! OUR STREETS?! WHO'S RIGHTS?! OUR RIGHTS! WHAT DO WE WANT!? JUSTICE! WHEN DO WE WANT IT?! NOW!!!!!
( More loveliness under this cut. )

DONATE TO NO on 8!! WE ARE BEHIND IN FUNDS & POLLS!!
https://secure.ga4.org/01/equalityforall


HERE IS WHY!

As some of you may be well aware of.
Currently California is locked in a battle between anti-gay forces
and those trying to preserve our constitutionally granted right to
Marry.

This election for California and the Nation is historic and here is
why.

Unlike Massachusetts, California Conservatives and particularly the
Mormon Church were able or organize a constitutional amendment effort
in California (like the other 35+ states where amendments have passed)
to appear on this falls Ballot.

The effort on the part of the Mormon Church represents over $10 Million
dollars, with the Yes on 8 (or the people wanting to amend the constitution
to remove same sex marriage) raising a shocking $26,000,000.- !!!
YES. That's 26 MILLION DOLLARS!

Be sure. Bush cronies including Dick Cheney, Carl Roves, and other minions
of the evil right have been working hard to "once and for all put the nail
in the coffin of queer marriage."

Our side has only raised about 15 Million, which represents the single largest
amount of money raised by any progressive effort to defeat a marriage amendment.
Only Arizona has been successful in fighting off a constitutional amendment
or any anti-gay marriage bill EVER. And that was only because the provision
would have removed several benefits for retirees through negative impacts
on Arizona's domestic partnership law.

WE ARE WAY BEHIND IN THE POLLS!
Recent polls show us loosing ground, and rapidly. Only three weeks ago we were
ahead by nearly 5% of the vote, now we are down by 4%... and that is not taking
into account the "Bigotry at the Box" affect, in which approximately 3 to 5% of
votes will vote to ban same sex marriage while telling pollsters otherwise.

I have volunteered nearly 200 hours in this effort! That's 200! I have made
nearly 2,000 Phone calls, Solicited well over $20,000 in donations, and worked
my ass off to help coordinate our message and media campaign here in the Bay Area.
I have been working Tirelessly.. and I am begging you all for help.

WHY THIS IS HISTORIC!
This will be the first time that the Right has actually repealed the right to marry
from same sex couples after a Supreme Court Decision in our favor. In what is widely
considered the most liberal state in the United States, or one of (perhaps now after
Massachusetts) It will be a two decade long setback for LGBT rights if we loose marriage
in one of only 2 states, and represent a loss of same sex marriage rights for approximately
15% of the US Population.

This is monumental.
This is the moment in LGBT rights that is essential.
This is Jim Crow, This is Mysegination Laws, this is Apartheid against LGBT Americans
being instilled in yet another constitution.

The Right has churches that garner MILLIONS of dollars in Support ever week! IN just
two weeks they raised nearly 10 Million dollars! We are being far out raised, and their
messages of fear and hate mongering area working!!

DONATE TO NO on 8!!!
$5.-, $10.-, even $100.- represents a HUGE gain for our side. If only 20 of you
donate 10, that represents a $200.- boost to the campaign. That is HUGE! The Right
is able to get Church goers to give nearly $25.- each a week in an effort to take away
our rights. I AM BEGGING AND PLEADING WITH YOU ALL TO DONATE IN MY NAME!

This is huge! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. I am begging you. As a queer activist and as a person
who believes that constitutions should enshrine rights not remove them... I am begging
you DONATE NOW!

https://secure.ga4.org/01/equalityforall

MOTHER FUCKER!

This has been the worst year for Technology for me.
1. I had my laptop stolen in Seattle the day before I left for San Francisco, someone
broke into my car and stole it.

2. Because my brother was fucking around and moving my CDRW in and out of my computer,
he somehow managed to magnetize the hard drive, essentially whipping all data.

3. The server my website was hosted on, completely crashed, had a critical error, and eliminated
my pictures, database (all the text of the site), and related material.

Essentially meaning: I only have pictures of myself from here on LJ, Facebook, Myspace, and
a few other random locations. Not NEARLY or remotely close to what I had on my hard drive
or website. Meaning: almost all pre-transition photos of me have been destroyed.

Fuck.

I am working on being a better buddhist and letting go of material possessions as they only
cause pain and suffering (or my attachment to them that is).. but this is just.. wow. A lot
to take in.

Fuck.
I will never recover those images. They are gone forever.
What a personal loss. This hurts more than almost anything else that has happened to me in
recent history. It's like my past has just been erased. Fuck.

~Danielle.

For those of you who don't know.
Anonymous is an internet collective. Most recently known for their
ongoing campaign against Scientology, criminal and corrupt organization
that strips people of human rights and exploits people who are vulnerable
and frequently captive to their message.

Anonymous is innovative, comical, brilliant, and hard working. I love it!
Check out this video, and check out you tube for Anonymous vs Scientology .



Dear Anonymous,
I have a big crush on you. Hope we can go on a date sometime.
Your brilliance and social action makes me swoon. Lets get it on.

~D*

Where in, the focus of power remains so heavily tilted towards men,
it is hard for me to imagine this world we live in, for it to be even remotely
possible for women who have sex with men to situate their own sexuality outside
of such a capitalized complex as 'sex as consumer item'
-- that is culturally defined as male-sexuality.

It is hard for me to divorce these realities from notions of male sexual dominance and
therefor the following 'natural' origins of 'horniness' that are propagated by both mass
media, as well as other cultural instruments such as churches, schools, and even intellectual discourse... based on a perpetuated lie, that humans are somehow incapable of controlling
their base desires or sexuality. Blasphemy!

Where is the female subjectivity in sexuality?
I do not see it on the page, in television, in pornography...
male performative masculinity continues to be promulgated in a dominance discourse
where even gay-identified men --formerly considered gender exceptional, continue to
be encouraged to 'consume' the body, the image, the 'capital' of sexuality in the historically
destructive manner in which women for centuries have so been subjugated under.

I see no 'authentic' or 'natural' images, language, or media targeted at a uniquely
feminine sexuality.. one that is somehow outside the notion of femininity as either
damsel in distress or whore in the bedroom.

It takes no further examination than personal ads, pornography, and MTV to see what
images continue to be put forward as 'liberating' women --now, liberated to self-market
and not 'mass market' ... is that truely liberation that our mothers and grandmothers
saw for us? We too can fuck like men without attachment or objective.

I remain highly skeptical of the notion that women's position has somehow 'advanced'
beyond gender.. no it has merely 'adopted' the normative values of masculinity. It
is perhaps in this powerful Trans-Feminist fourth wave that can start to see a bridge
beyond the ardent and rigid sexual and gender reality. Not one of abolition. One
situated firmly in the intrensic gender and sexual orientations... but one that does
not value masculinity and male-desires over femininity and female desires.

I do not think, it wise, and am in fact quite weary of. The notion of women as 'other men'
consumers.. simply on a market (that they do not own, not set the rules in) looking for
men who still dictate in the bedroom as well as the relationship. The terms and livelihoods
of said women.

I am not trying to tear down masculinity, for within the current construct there is an
ever-so-necessary mechanism --nobility. That for me, holds SUCH high potential. It is merely
in the framing of the discourse, the teaching of our sons, and the holding accountable to our
lovers and partners, our fathers and brothers. This notion of self-sacrifice as a core value
of masculinity, this notion of warm hearted concern, tenderness, and strength... and the
ensuing vulnerability, fragility, and susceptibility to emotion that comes from such an intense
connection.

But I dare say..
We can find a better way, to construct a sexuality up out of the current notion of masculine sexuality. That does not situate us all as sexual objects, devoid of emotion, purely consumeristic
property and units, to be moved around on an assembly line of pleasure. Plugging into one another
without connection, except for a brief, fleeting moment that is so perfect -yet entirely unsustainable. Let us think beyond our current paradigm to something more. Temperate and
centered in our inherant humanity and need for connection. I am not saying monogamy.
But something,
away from the disgusting excesses of capitalism.
Which the heart,
should never be for sale.

Or sold away for some strange notion -- of false freedom.
Sex is our most powerful tool to reach that deep interconnectedness.
No. Let us find within ourselves, an egalitarian way of sharing..

I want love, passion, emotion, and an intense desire to reach an allosexual pinnacle.
The autosexual dominance has taken over pornography --and hijacked our sexuality.

Let us.
Reclaim what is ours.
The right.. to love our lovers.
And treasure our bodies as well as our images.
Not merely as fuck-toy-play-things

But whole, decent, full human beings.

~Danielle

Allosexual - The desire to please someone else.. the the focus of sexuality being your partners pleasure.
Autosexual - The desire to please yourself... the focus of sexuality being your gratification

Interesting words from Alan Greenspan that I take with a grain of
salt. He thinks that the economy is doing 'remarkably well considering'
and that merely the financial sector will get shafted in this current
"Credit Crunch." I don't however, think that will be the case. Watch
it and find out. Remembering that, Greenspan like most bankers currently
has a lot riding on current crisis, including his reputation as the federal
reserve head.

http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=5798760

Hi All!

Currently I am working hard to schedule my East Coast trip which is going to be
happening from Monday October 13th to October 26th!!!! Here is the breakdown.

Monday 13th - Flying SFO -> JFK (NYC) - I need a place to stay this night! [SFO --> NYC]
Tuesday 14th - Meetings in NYC w/ Funders (Ford, Astrea, Queer Youth Fund) [NYC --> DC] in the PM
Wednesday 15th - Meetings w/ SMYAL + NYAC (9am-4pm) - National Safe Schools Roundtable (starts) [DC]
Thursday 16th - National Safe Schools Roundtable [DC --> PHL]
Friday 17th - Philadelphia (Equality Forum, Mazonni, GLSEN PA) - Need a place to stay this night [PHL]
Saturday 18th - Central NJ GSA Conference [Newark, NJ]
Sunday 19th - Hanging out in NYC/NJ [Newark, NJ]
Monday 20th - NYC / Long Island [NYC]
Tuesday 21st - Hartford, CT (True Colors) + Providence RI (Youth Pride) --> Boston that night
Wednesday 22nd - Boston Meetings (Project 10 East, BAGLY, GLSEN Boston).
Thursday 22nd - Boston Hanging out (KAEL! ARJAY! Hang with me!) BOS --> PTLD (PM)
Friday 23rd - Portland Maine
Saturday 24th - Portland, Maine
Sunday 25th - Portland, Maine --> BOS PM
Monday 26th - BOS --> SFO

Ok.
That is the schedule!
I am looking for places to stay in Boston, NYC, Philly, and Portland!!!!
I am trying to make this as much a low-budget trip as possible, and so that
means crashing on couches. Late night sleep-overs and slumber parties!

YAY!
I'm so stoked. This will be the first time I'm in Portland since I left in 2006!
Holla Back!

I am going to be emailing and hitting folks up here over the next few days to try and
get all my details pounded out.

YAY!
~Danielle

This is what taxes would look like under McCain and Bush supposedly.
The reality is that, The higher you go, the more you save with McCain.
Rich people don't need to be saving more money! HELL NO!

I have been following the events in Georgia very carefully over the
last weeks. Just as I did when Kosovo declared independence. Most
American's do not follow international media as closely as they should,
nor do they look to the west to see the approaching storm.

We are starting a second cold war. For one reason: Oil.

What most people don't realize is that Georgia has a number of economic
as well as historical importance to the west (particularly Europe). The
Caucus mountains are from whence Caucasians come from. Georgia has the
oldest "European" Archeological findings of 'civilization' or even human
population in Europe. There is another reason why Russia is breathing
down Georgia's neck. Aside from the fact that Georgia has been cozzying
up to the west visa vi NATO for some time, George is also home to a large
number of trans-ural pipelines that carry Natural Gas and Petrolium to
the West from the Khazacks.

Russia is saying. "Fuck you, we're back bitches." And with a vengence.
Since the end of the cold war, Russia has smartly positioned itself as
the nurse-made with her tit out to Europe's very hungry-for-oil + gas
baby mouth. They provide over 53% of Europes current 'energy'.. through
Petro, Natural Gas, and Hydro-Electric power. And with only a decade between
the fall of the old soviet republic, and now.. Russia is hungry to gobble
back up its former states.

I think everyone in Eastern Europe is taking a hard gulp and bracing themselves
for the inevitable battle that is coming. Be it political, social, or economic..
Russia is hungry to reassert its status as "World Power"... The economy of
Russia has been growing at an alarming rate at the hands of the Oligarchs who
took power after the fall of the old Soviet communism... and with such a one-party
entrenched culture that the Russians have been use to for-forever, and a deep
desire to 'not worry'... and just be taken care of by a Daddy Government..
Russia has pretty much fallen into a 'democratically appointed' old-soviet style
politic run by former KGB bosses.

America needs to wake up.
We are seriously weakened by our fucked economic and foreign policies, and we
are about to get gut-fucked with a nice swift soviet punch to the balls. Don't
get me wrong, I am not Anti-Soviet, nor Anti-Russia. I am pro-freedom and I happen
to feel that the Soviet version of freedom for Eastern Europe was very fucked for
almost everyone! Nothing good came of decades of repression. I am for the growth
and prosperity of the human race, and Russia is breathing down the necks of Eastern
Europe, enough to make them cringe up and start to engage in fear-driven politics.

Western Europe needs to be cautious too. We have seen this kind of ramp-up of
rhetoric in Europe so many times. Before both great world wars. There is always
a 'lull' and 'reformation' of Fascists before they make the big push to gain back
what they had lost. A modern war would be devistating. Even if faught in a conventional
sense, there are still plenty of nasty non-nuclear weapons to whipe out the better part
of Eastern Europe. The Market economies there are still very weak, and while
some of the former soviet states might in theory be 'safe' through their EU alliances,
the EU does not per-se guarantee they will not be invaded.

I wonder. Would America drop IRAQ and Afghanistan like a hot potato to come to the aid
of Eastern Europe? Certainly the UN has been made essentially useless by the Security
Counsels permanent seats (China, France, UK, USA, and Russia)... I mean, if you can get
those 5 to agree on shit. HA! Impossible! Russia is not about to agree to resolutions
that are not in its best interest of expansion.

And while I am very convinced that the first cold war was propigated and perpetuated
by the West through a series of escalations, proxy wars, CIA operations and misinformation.
I am having a hard time feeling 'warm and fuzzy' towards Russia's recent aggressions
in Georgia. I wonder, what did really go down in South Ossetia? Did Georgia really
engage in ethnic cleansing? Which side of the rhetoric is correct? Did Russia take the
proper channels to deal with Georgia's misdeeds if there was in fact ethnic cleansing?
Or is that their convenient excuse for the invasion?

I have a hard time believing either side.
But since I can't just fly myself to Georgia to find out, I have to remain skeptical but
believe the moderately neutral countries like Sweden + Switzerland when they say what
Russia did was uncalled for. I hope the EU brokered peace deal works out, but wow, yeah.
Crazy.

New cold war people.
It is coming. Big brother is just over your shoulder.
Watch McCain wrap up this election super soon. Same-sex marriage will be banned in California.
We are deep into the conservative swing in the US. Think: The 1950's... Only scarier.
The Big Wheel keeps on turning.

~D*